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Scene Map 18
# PG SLUGLINE
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Scene Map
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# PG SLUGLINE
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EXT. CIRCUS, CIRCA 1850’S- DAY A mid-nineteenth century circus unfurls. Colorful tents rise against the blue sky, where laughter and gasps mingle in the air. We catch fleeting glimpses of the attractions: a MAN SWALLOWING FIRE, a BEARDED WOMAN casting a playful wink,
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INT. DRESSING ROOM- 2025- DAY Jake is still lost in the daydream, still lovingly fixed on his mental image of Angus as the music reaches it’s final crescendo. Except he’s not at a mid-nineteenth century circus. Nor is he dressed like a ringmaster. He’s in a modern
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EXT. LAWN OUTSIDE BANQUET HALL- DAY Sam is being held up sideways by his seven groomsmen. Jake is standing at the edge of the group, sort of lending a hand to help hold up Sam’s feet. VANESSA, (35, PHOTOGRAPHER) takes the picture. They put Sam down.
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EXT. LAWN OUTSIDE BANQUET HALL- AFTERNOON The ceremony is underway. Sam is looking distracted, standing at the alter across from the BRIDE, REBECCA, (31, 5’8), who is holding a microphone, reciting her vows. REBECCA
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EXT. LAWN OUTSIDE BANQUET HALL- DUSK The reception is underway. The sounds of laughter and chatter abound. Jake stands in front of the hors d’oeurve table by himself, TEQUILA SUNRISE in hand, snacking on prosciutto. Suddenly, Lucy the bridesmaid interjects. She’s holding a
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INT. BATHROOM STALL INSIDE BANQUET HALL- MINUTES LATER Jake sits on the toilet, once again with his pants ON, playing DOODLE JUMP on his phone and sipping on his Tequila Sunrise. The distant sounds of music, laughter, and chatter spill through the walls.
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EXT. LAWN OUTSIDE BANQUET HALL- NIGHT Everyone is seated around tables as the bride and groom go from table to table expressing their thanks. Jake is sitting at a table with 5 much older family members. He has the same grin, coupled with a vacant stare. His AUNT
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INT. TRADER JOE’S- DAY Jake stands behind a register, bagging groceries in his TRADER JOE’S UNIFORM AND NAME TAG. He has the exact same expression of worry on his face as he mindlessly stuffs groceries into a bag. Next to him, ringing the groceries up
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INT. TRADER JOE’S- LATER Maisley stands idly by the register, sipping on MATCHA TEA. Jake is going register to register, pushing a CLEANING CART and collecting trash. He stops by Maisley’s register and collects her mini trash can.
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INT. TRADER JOE'S BATHROOM- DAY The door is propped open. Jake is busy mopping. Puddles cover the tile floor. Maisley lounges against the propped door, engrossed in Jake’s phone. MAISLEY
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INT. OTHER TRADER JOE’S BATHROOM- CONTINUOUS Jake starts scrubbing the toilet. Maisley is still glued to his phone. MAISLEY Ok, drinking alcohol: Never,
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INT. BAR- NIGHT Jake sits at a table by himself. We hear his heart THUMPING LOUDLY. His phone tells him it’s 7:39. He tries out a few different resting facial expressions. HALEY, 28, approaches the table.
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EXT. GRIFFITH PARK HIKING TRAIL- NIGHT There’s a tapestry of stars in the sky, casting a silvery glow on the trail. No people in sight. We hear nothing but the wind, until suddenly: Footsteps. Big footsteps.
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INT. TRADER JOE’S- MORNING Jake stands behind a register, barely containing his anxiety. He spots Maisley clocking in at the “Bridge” (the front desk). After he sees her, he adopts a very different countenance. He starts moping. Eyes low, shoulders drooped.
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INT. JAKE'S CAR- NIGHT Jake turns off the car. He is parked outside an EXPENSIVE MODERN STYLE HOUSE. The glow of party lights and sounds of chatter spill into the street. Next to him, in the passenger seat, sits Maisley, putting mascara on in the mirror. He
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INT. SAM AND REBECCA’S HOUSE- CONTINUOUS Jake opens the door, stepping cautiously into the house. Maisley walks in after him. About 15-20 people mingle in clusters, laughter and chatter filling the air. No one seems to notice them until...
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INT. SAM AND REBECCA’S HOUSE- LATER IN THE EVENING Maisley is flirting with her new friend, NINA, 23. The interest appears to be reciprocal. MAISLEY ...No, Womb Envy was pioneered by
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INT. SAM'S HOUSE- LATER Maisley is still engrossed in conversation with her new companion. Jake sits alone on the couch playing DOODLE JUMP on his phone. Sam walks over and sits down next to him. SAM

Jake and Angus

A socially awkward autistic man's fantastical imaginary friend, the legendary strongman Angus MacAskill, helps him navigate the complexities of modern dating and family.

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Overview

Poster
Unique Selling Point

The screenplay's unique selling proposition lies in its dual narrative structure that juxtaposes the extraordinary life of Angus MacAskill with the relatable, modern-day challenges faced by Jake, a neurodivergent character. This combination not only provides historical intrigue but also fosters a deeper understanding of contemporary issues surrounding identity and acceptance, making it compelling for audiences interested in character-driven stories that challenge societal norms.

AI Verdict & Suggestions

Ratings are subjective. So you get different engines' ratings to compare.

Hover over verdict cards for Executive Summaries

Gemini
 Consider
Claude
 Consider
GPT4
 Recommend
Story Facts
Genres:
Drama 60% Comedy 40% Romance 30% Fantasy 20%

Setting: Mid-nineteenth century and modern day (2025), Various locations including a circus, a banquet hall, Trader Joe's grocery store, and a hiking trail in Griffith Park

Themes: Self-Acceptance and Embracing Neurodiversity, The Power of Human Connection and Belonging, Finding Love and Acceptance in Unexpected Places, Family Dynamics and the Pressure to Conform

Conflict & Stakes: Jake's struggle with social anxiety and romantic relationships, compounded by family expectations and his own insecurities.

Mood: Light-hearted with moments of introspection and humor.

Standout Features:

  • Unique Hook: The juxtaposition of a historical figure, Angus MacAskill, with modern-day social anxieties creates a unique narrative dynamic.
  • Character Development: Jake's journey of self-discovery and acceptance, supported by his interactions with Angus and Maisley.
  • Humor and Heart: The screenplay balances comedic moments with heartfelt interactions, making it relatable and engaging.

Comparable Scripts: The Greatest Showman, Big Fish, Atypical, The Elephant Man, Wonder, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Big Sick, Little Miss Sunshine, About Time

Script Level Analysis

Writer Exec

This section delivers a top-level assessment of the screenplay’s strengths and weaknesses — covering overall quality (P/C/R/HR), character development, emotional impact, thematic depth, narrative inconsistencies, and the story’s core philosophical conflict. It helps identify what’s resonating, what needs refinement, and how the script aligns with professional standards.

Screenplay Insights

Breaks down your script along various categories.

Overall Score: 7.31
Story Critique
Big-picture feedback on the story’s clarity, stakes, cohesion, and engagement.
Characters
Explores the depth, clarity, and arc of the main and supporting characters.
Emotional Analysis

Breaks down the emotional journey of the audience across the script.

Goals and Philosophical Conflict
Evaluates character motivations, obstacles, and sources of tension throughout the plot.
Themes
Analysis of the themes of the screenplay and how well they’re expressed.
Logic & Inconsistencies
Highlights any contradictions, plot holes, or logic gaps that may confuse viewers.

Scene Analysis

All of your scenes analyzed individually and compared, so you can zero in on what to improve.

Scene-Level Percentile Chart
Hover over the graph to see more details about each score.
Go to Scene Analysis

Other Analyses

Writer Exec

This section looks at the extra spark — your story’s voice, style, world, and the moments that really stick. These insights might not change the bones of the script, but they can make it more original, more immersive, and way more memorable. It’s where things get fun, weird, and wonderfully you.

Unique Voice
Assesses the distinctiveness and personality of the writer's voice.
Writer's Craft
Analyzes the writing to help the writer be aware of their skill and improve.
Memorable Lines
Spotlights standout dialogue lines with emotional or thematic power.
Tropes
Highlights common or genre-specific tropes found in the script.
World Building
Evaluates the depth, consistency, and immersion of the story's world.
Correlations
Identifies patterns in scene scores.
Loglines
Presents logline variations based on theme, genre, and hook.

Comparison with Previous Draft

See how your script has evolved from the previous version. This section highlights improvements, regressions, and changes across all major categories, helping you understand what revisions are working and what may need more attention.

Version Comparison Analysis
Summary of Changes
Improvements (5)
  • Character Complexity - characterRelatability: 8.0 → 9.0 +1.0
  • Character Complexity - characterDiversity: 7.0 → 8.0 +1.0
  • Character Complexity - characterDialogue: 8.0 → 9.0 +1.0
  • Premise - premiseClarity: 6.0 → 7.0 +1.0
  • Premise - premiseExecution: 7.0 → 8.0 +1.0
Areas to Review (0)

No regressions detected